Thursday, May 19, 2005

Bryn Mawr: It's all about style

OK. I laughed out loud when I saw this. As RiRi Thibodaux once said regarding the apparel of the typical Bryn Mawr student: "It's all about style."

Because I went to the most anal school in the universe (well, Johns Hopkins, MIT and Cal Tech may beat us out...), someone felt it necessary to mail this out 8 days before reunion. Enjoy - my comments follow in brackets.

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REUNION FASHION ADVICE
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Reunion is really just about visiting friends, not about what you wear. Nevertheless, this is an angst-laden topic for many, so our event planners put together some pointers for staying comfortable at a spring event at Bryn Mawr.

[because we have to worry about something besides what we're doing with our lives and how we never got that Ph.D despite winning the hoop race, there's fashion. I mean, without the stress of finals or the competition for fellowships, how will one feel truly at home chez Mawr? By agonizing about the one thing you didn't care about while in college: fashion]

When packing for Reunion, keep in mind that events are mostly casual with only one or two "dressed up" occassions.

[and by "dressed up," we mean, "get out of the flannel jammies!"]

All-Reunion meals (all breakfasts, Friday dinner and Saturday lunch in the Cloisters) are casual and family-friendly, as are programmed events. Shorts, slacks, jeans, T-shirts or polo shirts are perfectly appropriate for these meals.

[Not appropriate items: capes or bustiers. People, this is not the day we can't mention or the feast of M. Carey Thomas]

Saturday night class dinners are slightly more formal, as are events at the President's House (nice slacks and a blouse or simple knit or cocktail-length dress work fine).

[Please, for the love of God, don't wear slacks with pleats. Also, wearing a Chanel suit at Bryn Mawr is so uncooth. The woman was a collaborator! Didn't you learn anything from Historical Imagination!?]

THINK WRINKLE-FREE: The dorms don't have irons, so it's best to bring clothes that will stand up to traveling. Synthetic fabric knits and sturdy tailored items do well.

[We love polyester at Bryn Mawr... But is this message a subtle way to say that driers are off limits? Damn, I was hoping to schedule in some free laundry in the basement!]

LAYER...there's no telling what the weather will be, so the best bet is to layer: tank-top or t-shirt under long-sleeve with a sweater or cardigan and light jacket.

[Overalls over your shorts are not acceptable]

FOOTWEAR: Happy feet make happy alums (and a better event) - Keep in mind that many meals and events are OUTSIDE, which means that slender or stiletto-style heels (while popular this season) will sink in the grass. Uneven turf can also contribute to twisted ankles and spills. Your best bet when stepping off the pavement is flat-soled shoes or styles with wide, chunky or wedge heels.

[Wearing Manolo Blahniks will not erase the memory of four years in socks and Birkenstocks. Get over yourself. Additionally, please do not jump into the fountain in heels. This is a dangerous practice.]

- If it is chilly or rainy, open-toed shoes are not very comfortable. Pack a closed-toe alternative just in case.

[Again, socks do not close an open-toed shoe]

- TOURS require SNEAKERS. In fact, comfortable walking shoes are a must if you are going to be participating in a full day of activities. Wait until your class dinner to show off those killer fashion kicks.

[And by kicks we do not mean it is acceptable to kick your former classmates who deserve a beatdown. Please use language for such thrashings. We went to Bryn Mawr, after all.]

5 Comments:

Blogger R J Keefe said...

See? Kids don't learn a damned thing in college today.

Thu May 19, 06:05:00 PM  
Blogger lequincampe said...

What? What is that supposed to mean? That we don't learn about fashion? Please. I am going to retreat to the Ivory Tower and stay there forever.

Thu May 19, 06:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I laughed at this, too, especially the part about open-toed shoes being uncomfortable when it's cold. I wonder just how brainless they think their average alumna is.

Fri May 20, 03:15:00 AM  
Blogger lequincampe said...

Evidently, they feel it's all downhill once you get the diploma. Honestly, that might not be wrong... Just kidding!

Fri May 20, 11:03:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, you. With the funny.

That was just lovely. The best part is - I mean, like no one's ever spent a summer in Philly after going to BMC??? Come on! We know what the weather is like!

Fri May 20, 07:49:00 PM  

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